by Cassie Title
Sometimes when "The Vampire Diaries" goes on hiatus for two weeks, so many exciting things happen upon its return that I don't even know how to start a recap! For instance, I could start by talking about the fact that humanity-less Elena wants all of us to know that she simply doesn't care. And I believe her, except: Isn’t it a sign that you care if you keep telling people you don’t?
I was also thinking I’d write about Silas, because even though he hardly figured into this episode, they made a big deal about this whole multi-hospital-blood-bag-thievery thing, and Damon’s convinced that Silas is the culprit, because he’s been frozen for however many thousands of years and needs to feed.
Oh, and there’s the obvious title choice: "Bring it On" is an ode to the classic cheerleader movie about spunky girls and spunky attitudes, and since Elena rejoined cheerleading, you could say it was a reference. But there’s also the fact that she’s fighting with everyone, especially Caroline, who she tries to stake, and she’s all tough girl to everyone, like, bring it on, bitches!
But what I’m really going to go with is my new favorite subject: Elena. Yes, folks, you read that right. I freaking love Elena. Now, I’m guessing it won’t last for long (she’s usually such a bore), but tonight, she was fun, sharp, logical and, of course, pretty bad. I’m going to elaborate.
Why Elena is now great:
Yes, she’s feeding on people (tricking innocent drivers by lying down in the road, going so far as to join cheerleading so she can eat some vervain-free competition, attempting to feed on Caroline’s mom) but she’s being interesting, for once. She’s letting loose, having fun, dancing around, throwing parties at the Salvatore mansion. She’s also being cleanly logical: Yes, obviously everyone wants her to feel again, but for now, she’s finally saying things like they are and avoiding her usual more-righteous-than-thou shtick. She tells Damon that he can admit he likes her better like this; she has this brutally honest, deadpan conversation with Liz, pre-attempted attack; she tells Stefan not to compare her to Katherine, because Katherine’s afraid of her own shadow, but Elena isn’t afraid of anything; she tells Stefan that she remembers they had good sex, but she doesn’t feel anything about it anymore, and the fact that he does, the fact that she is his whole world, suggests that he should turn off his emotions, as well. Some of these things are painful, some of these things are mean, and some of them aren’t the best way to do something. But they’re all pretty much true.
So I really like Phoebe Tonkin, but:
As interested in her storyline as I am, I feel as if the producers just really ended up liking her and wanting to use her. Which is totally fine, but I wish they had dealt with her plotline better in the last bunch of episodes. She disappeared and came back and it feels too forced. That being said, I dig her. Like, I really like her. I want to know all about her freaky birth mark and her werewolf clan in New Orleans and her search for her birth family and why she’s so into Tyler when he’s pretty lame and what possessed her to have really hot, almost violent sex with Klaus.
Tyler Lockwood:
It seems he’s gone for good. He signed over the deed of his house to Matt, which was really nice, because not only is every Lockwood dead besides Ty, (Richard! Carol! Mason!), but Matt, that lovely, poor, abandoned kid who somehow miraculously supports himself and hasn’t gotten put somewhere by child protective services, needs a huge house to stay in. Because he really needs all the rooms. But, really. Tyler wrote a letter to Caroline, saying goodbye forever. (Wait. Didn’t this happen two episodes ago?) I guess Caroline will have to stop leaving voice messages for him; it’s basically taken the place of Elena or Stefan reading their idiotic diaries, and it’s starting to get old.
Hayley and Katherine:
Yo! You guys! Apparently they worked together! I know we found this out last time, but Hayley explains that Katherine had a network of allies who were loyal to her, and that’s how she escaped Klaus for all this time. Damon seems to think that Kat wants to shove the cure down Klaus’s throat, and I guess kill him. Katherine apparently found Hayley in New Orleans, saying that she could help Hayley find her birth family. That’s why Hayley told her about the cure and shiz. But now that Kat has no use for Hayley anymore, she assigns a minion to get rid of her. Except, this minion is bitten by Klaus. And his name happens to be Will.
Will:
Whoa. Apparently, Damon knew Will! There is a picture of them! I’m guessing it was taken in New York, because that’s where Damon takes Elena at the end of the episode. And where we’ll see them next episode. But Will is dying! And Damon says he'll help! And then he tears his heart out! ‘Cause he's too far gone! And it's all loving and merciful, like he did for Rose, but he had Klaus’s blood! WHY IS IT TOO LATE? And now they have no easy way to get to Katherine! And I have no way of finding out who Will is at the moment! This looks so exciting I want to learn about him! I can’t fathom that Damon had a friend other than Alaric!
Vervained Water, Sire Bonds, The Usual:
Vervain in the water is the newest excuse for nakedness. Apparently, the Salvatore mansion magically pumps water that’s not affected. So that explains why Caroline is sitting there in a bathrobe, waiting to scrub down. Then Elena comes out of the shower and drops trou. When everybody looks at her all crazy, she's all like: Hey, it’s nothing you guys haven’t seen before. Which is so true, ‘cause both Damon and Stefan have seen her naked. Oh, and later on she flirts with Stefan, changing in front of him. And stretching her leg suggestively on his shoulder. It’s really weird, because it’s going against what I think is right: Elena is in love with Damon, sire bond or not. She’s no longer in love with Stefan. But all of these things make the other characters’ dumb opinions seem true: That when she’s no longer sired, she’ll love Stefan again. Which is so wrong for so many reasons; I’m not going to even bother talking about it again, because if you believe that she only loves Damon because she’s sired to him, you’ve clearly been missing the point. But, Damon tells her to not eat people, and have fun at school, but she keeps eating people. And Stefan realizes that the sire bond isn’t working, because it was born out of her feelings for Damon (FEELINGS THAT WERE ALREADY PRESENT, PEOPLE. GET IT?). So Elena’s sired no more, I guess. It’s sorta confusing, because I’m not sure of Elena and Damon’s relationship status. At the end, they’re road-tripping to New York, so maybe we’ll see that she loves him. Except she has no feelings. And no sire bond. She’s kind of just out of control, in general. I do have to commend Nina, though. She’s playing emotionless Elena well; not quite Katherine, who can feel and is feisty and evil but full of life, but a compelling character who’s actually devoid of feeling, but can still have a good time. I know we’ll get our old Elena back, but for now, I’m enjoying this "better version"— as she calls herself, questionably, I know, but show-wise, it’s true.
What did you think of this week’s episode? Were you crawling with anticipation the last two weeks? Theories on Will? Excited for the trip to New York? Impressed with Nina’s acting? Wondering where Bonnie was? Is Tyler ever coming back? Freaked out about the Hayley/Klaus thing? Where is Katherine? Did you like Rebekah calling Damon a brain-damaged Sherlock? We were in a hospital; where was Meredith Fell? Am I really supposed to believe four seasons later that Elena’s mom, Caroline’s mom and Bonnie’s mom were all best friends in high school, and they’ve basically never mentioned it? Shouldn’t that have been the first thing, "Sisterhood of the Traveling Pants" style? Were you confused that Liz was hanging with Stefan and not her usual Salvatore? Is Rebekah’s obsession with being human again almost as annoying as everyone’s obsession with thinking Elena’s “too good” to be a vampire? Let us know, via Twitter or below!
Okay, YA fans: We're thinking of a number between one and 10. Can you guess what it is? We'll give you a hint: It's a magic number. A mysterious number. A number that connotes strength, and courage, and brooding tortured hotness that makes Abnegation transfers go weak in their selfless little knees.
From a cocaine bender to a Q-Tip blunder, it's been a dark and twisty season for Hannah Horvath and her "